Signs you are dealing with a B.A.N.S

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What’s up wreckless people?!

So let’s get straight to it. My sister insisted I listen to the Atlantic Record recording singer and song writer, Sevyn Streeter, so I finally decided to check her out. I think right now she is most known for the recent single from her EP with Chris Brown, “It won’t stop”, but the song that caught my attention was B.A.N.S. (B**ch A** Ni**as)

Just to give you a sample of the lyrics, here are a few quotes:

“I should’ve I never offered it/But he made me feel like this could be forever”

I should’ve used protection/Instead of moving so fast”

“One minute call us baby/Next minute call us crazy/Ni**as be on that bullsh*t/B**ch a** ni**as”

We have heard about these dudes plenty of times. As referenced in her song she describes these dudes for breaking several promises, making you look foolish, and having several regrets after dealing with them. This song spoke to me, ironically the songstress and I are about the same age and I’ve dealt with a few B.A.N.S. here or there just as many people I know have as well.

Anyway I got to thinking and laughing, thankfully mostly laughing, but you can always sense a B.A.N.S from a mile away and just like with most situations there are several signs that usually people ignore but are pretty obvious. So here is my list of signs that you are dealing with a B.A.N.S

  • Irresponsible

When it is everybody else’s fault for his problems except him. That’s a B.A.N.S. Ummm he needs to stop blaming everybody for his situation in life. It is no one’s fault but his. When you hear a dude constantly displacing the blame, turn the page because you will get bored first then sick and tired later.

  • Dishonesty

First and foremost just straight lying for no reason! I mean how many times have you caught a B.A.N.S. lying about the color of his socks. Like really? So you just think I’m color blind now? If you sense any form of dishonesty; white lie, stupid lie, forgetful lie, whatever please know you are dealing with a B.A.N.S. and get your eyes checked if he lies so well that you are convinced the sky is red.

  • Inconsistency

Okay I’ll give an example: One week or month you are constantly contacted via text messages, phone calls, emails, he even calls you from the job phone during his lunch break with coworkers around and the next month you see him posting 1000 pictures on Instagram but hasn’t sent you a text to let you know he’s even off work. I hate to tell you but you are dealing with a B.A.N.S.

  • Borrowing Money

Ummm absolutely the HUGEST sign of a B.A.N.S. Do I even need to explain? If he is comfortable with asking, RUN! Y’all making a popeyes run for a two piece, it’s $4.99 and he’s looking to you to handle it. Drop the chicken and the biscuit(even the biscuit) and RUN! That’s a B.A.N.S.

  • Insecurity

There are several brackets to this word but essentially when a dude goes out of his way to prove something that he should already be secure about. You are dealing with a B.A.N.S. If you are in control of your emotions but constantly screaming, crying and yelling about how you are in control of your emotions, my dude you are a B.A.N.S.

  • Physical Aggression

Ummm in no way should a man EVER think it is okay to push you, shove you, throw anything at you, any physical aggression at all. That’s a B.A.N.S at its best. Stay clear for the men who always say “a man shouldn’t hit a woman but if a woman hits a man then things change”. No… Only thing that changed is you just went from potentially being a real dude to a B.A.N.S. ten minus ten seconds after you made that statement.

  • Constant Complaining

Ever felt like you can’t complain because your dude beats you to the punch. Yeah, thats a B.A.N.S. How about you stop complaining and do something. You can do anything you put your mind to! You can even stop acting like a B.A.N.S.

  • Has you Questioning your Woman’s intuition

You know that gut feeling and instinct that you convince yourself you shouldn’t listen to ever since you started dealing with this dude. Uh. Yeah you’re dealing with a B.A.N.S. Go to church shake it off and slap yourself together. You know what you feel is right. Act accordingly.

I mean I could probably go on all day but this list actually stop being funny and turned too REAL because there are actual beings in the world like this. So I’ll stop here and if you have any comments or even signs that I didn’t mention, comment below. In the meantime between time check out Sevyn Streeter’s EP titled “Call me Crazy But…”, I approve:)

Stay wreckless,

Aminah

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2 Comments

  1. Nzingha Murphy
    January 21, 2014 / 9:46 am

    Lol the list started getting real though! Love it!

  2. Articia
    January 22, 2014 / 11:25 am

    Real talk! Keep them posts coming Boo.

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